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Are You A Ninja?

When you think of “ninja”, do you envision…


or maybe even?

If you ask someone that plays an MMORPG such as World of Warcraft, you’ll find that most of them picture some selfish snot-nosed little brat that steals all the loot that drops whether they need it or not.

WoWWiki has a pretty good definition of ninja.

I usually think of three types of ninjas: The Blatant Ninja, The Apologetic Ninja, and The Stealth ninja.

The Blatant Ninja

These guys are pretty obvious to spot. Everything they do and say is about them. They are only interested in the here and now and only how it pertains to them.

These are the guys that:

  • Loot quickly
  • Need on everything, even if only for vendor trash.
  • Attend raids, heroics, and other events on farm, but mysteriously are absent from progression.
  • Farm herbs, skin animals, mine ore, loot chest, etc. while someone is attempting to fight the mobs that are protecting that area.

Everybody recognizes these people quickly.

The Apologetic Ninja

When Hallow’s End started last Saturday, a group of us decided to get together and kill The Headless Horseman. As you know several different types of flying brooms can drop off him and most people are intrigued by them. I am not one of these people.

Last year, I got to see what a broom was like and it’s not that cool. It only lasts 14 days so it’s kinda pointless anyway. So rather than deprive someone else that might really enjoy it, I pass on any that drop unless everyone else has one.

Our first broom drops and someone in party accidentally clicks need. This upset one of the guys, who I later found out is a 15 year old kid, that really wanted one. We informed the one that made the mistake that we greed on brooms.

The next broom drops. I pass, the guy who needed on the last one passes, one greeds, and then the crap hits the fan! One guy was smart enough to wait. The kid that was upset starts yelling at us to stop greeding and to need on it. We tell him no and to greed. He says “w/e I’m needing” and proceeds to need on it.

After we finished killing the Horseman several times, I left the group and proceeded to /gkick the ninja. He then proceeds to take the next few days whispering different guild members to try and find out why I kicked him.

Finally, someone invites him into a group that I was in and not wanting to discuss the issue, I finally acquiesced into doing so. He argues that it wasn’t an important item so what’s the big deal. After failing to make him understand what he did was wrong, he kept at us about getting reinvited into the guild which I told him wouldn’t happen.

He apologized profusely even attempting to buy the broom off of us in order to get back in. The apologetic ninja will say anything, regardless if they’re truly sorry, to get what they want. Bottom line, he’s still a ninja.

The Stealth Ninja

You probably have to watch out for these guys more than any others. These are the guys that often profess to be about the guild, helping others, and willing to help, but through subtle comments and actions will quickly show themselves as being only out for themselves.

Let’s take the other night for example. My guild was running Black Temple as a serious attempt for the first time. Before the nerf, we ran Black Temple trash for fun and it was extremely difficult, but we did get to Naj’entus. We’ve come a long way since then and without the nerf we probably wouldn’t have downed Naj’entus as we had some undergeared people with us that couldn’t have survived the aoe.

We killed him on our third attempt, I think, and a ring dropped which a new level 70 Holy Pally could have really used. Due to our rank loot rules, she was one of the last on the list for it. As Loot Master, I asked everyone ranked higher than her if they were willing to pass to her because we severely need geared healers, as it’s the one thing that prevents us from raiding more than any other. Everyone agreed. I believe a very shocked Holy Pally was pleasantly surprised to see she had won an item in Black Temple before so many others.

As we continued on to Supremus one of our Veteran ranked officers on his healer alt mentioned that that would be the last time he passed for a while because he was going to have to take a break from raiding soon for at least a month or so.

/pause for dramatic effect

Wait, let me get that right. We have an officer that is going to refuse to pass on the next upgrade for him because he won’t get a chance at loot for a while?

/pause to rub temple because the strain from trying to see this logic is really starting to hurt

I pointed out that was even more reason for him to pass because we need geared people to help us continue the last few weeks of raiding before the expansion. No need to gear up someone who isn’t going to be around the last few weeks.

/dead silence

Does he have the right to not pass? Absolutely. Is he expressing a desire to help the guild or help himself? Uh, gimme a sec to think on that…

The stealth ninja will do anything and everything to get what he or she wants as quickly as they can. They may profess to do things for the good of the guild and will often champion that cause, when it doesn’t affect them directly, but let the tables turn and they show their true colors.

Keep your eye out for these guys because you may find that even the most benevolent of your guild members will be this guy from time to time.  Sometimes they won’t even realize it.

Next time you’re running something ask yourself this question.

Is the blackness of your belt blacker than the inside of a coffin on a moonless night?