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A Place To Call Home

Why are we attracted to guilds?

This is a question that cropped up in my mind today after making a decision about whether or not to leave my guild.

If you’ve been following my blog over the last few weeks, I’ve talked a little bit about my frustrations with my guild and potentially looking at a server transfer. Several times I decided to bite the bullet and go through with it and yet as I logged on I found myself unable to /gquit, even as the frustration continued to build.

    jiminy2Me: Why can’t I not go through with it?
    Jiminy: It’s because you feel like you’re betraying your friends.
    Me: But am I not also betraying myself by being miserable and betraying the guild by being unavailable* for raids?
    Jiminy: Yup, but you’re afraid the guilt you’ll feel after leaving will be worse than the guilt you feel now.
    Me: Well, that’s not fair. /sulks
    Jiminy: Just remember that no one’s irreplaceable and they’ll get along without you just fine.
    Me: OK, I’m going to quit. I want to not dread raiding again and it isn’t fair to them that I’m online, but not available.

So I bit the bullet last night and decided to announce I was quitting in our Officer Meeting. I wanted them to understand exactly why I was quitting and leave on a good note. However, things went a different way and a plan was devised to make some things better***. (As it turns out I’m not the only Officer that’s burned out.)

Several Officers expressed their hope that I’d stay in the guild. During our Guild Meeting it was also expressed by some of the Guild Members. This made me feel good, as it would anyone. We all want to belong, whether it’s as the elite raider, the guy with vast WoW knowledge**, the funny guy, the well-respected leader, the nice guy, or whatever other role that makes us feel like we belong.

So it occurred to me that maybe guilds aren’t attractive because of raiding, socializing, leveling, pvp’ing, or whatever the guild does, but rather they’re attractive because “sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name and they’re always glad you came”. Guilds are attractive because we’re all looking for a place to call home.

* I’ve been purposely not signing up for raids for the past two weeks.
** Not me by the way. I screw up my UI at least weekly and can’t remember the names of 90% of my spells. 🙂
*** I suppose the worst case scenario is that it doesn’t get better and I bite the bullet. I’m just tired of worrying and writing about it as much as you are of probably reading about it. Sorry Amber, still holding you guys on the backburner.

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9 Responses

  1. Personally I see guilds as somewhat of a professional partnership. Yes, you can be friends with people, but if they’re not holding up their end of the bargain, you’re perfactly justified in looking for others who will. More often than not, it’s not a personal thing, and if it is a personal thing then that’s going to affect your professional relationship as well. If the guild can fix your issues and you can be happy working with them again, then fantastic. But if they don’t, well, unlike in real life right now, plenty of people have the Help Wanted sign out.

  2. Friends, socializing, raiding, loot, pvp. Regardless of why we join guilds, if we don’t feel like we belong we don’t stay.

    Now you could argue that some people jump guilds for loot. And you’d be right, but I suppose I can argue that as long as they are getting loot they feel like they belong. Soon as they stop getting loot, they often feel like the guild has nothing to offer them and they no longer belong.

  3. Ah, the loot factor. The problem is that some people don’t realize that they didn’t get the loot, the guild got them the loot. That doesn’t mean you’re beholden to them or anything, but anyone who’s not an a-hole should realize that they’re not wearing the purps because they’re teh awesomez, but because others were there to help them. Mayb if more people thought like that we’d see less people bailing out as soon as they get the “Epic” achievement.

  4. 🙂 We can all dream.

  5. I was in a very similar place. I was an officer in a guild where there were 20 or so who had sped their way to 80 and the balance got left behind. They did their progression and got their needs filled and then when the rest of the guild started to hit 80 and needed help these people did not want to help. My frustatration hit the boiling point when the GM would say one thing (yes we have to help) but then turn around and do the exact opposite. I quit the guild and moved to a smaller one that is only doing 10’s (I mss 25-man raids – a lot!) but did not have the conflicts or drama that was happening. I’ve been in the guild for less than a month and it feels like home – I’ve been included in progression runs for them and it feels nice to log on and not dread seeing officer chat or dread raiding.

    The game is once again fun for me.

  6. KyKy just likes to get my hopes up, and then crush them.

    /sob

  7. @ Amber – have faith in people’s inability to change. LOL!

  8. /lip quivers

  9. I totally need to take a pic of me pouting for these moments.

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