One of the best things about World of Warcraft is the fact that it’s an MMO. One of the worst things about World of Warcraft is the fact that it’s an MMO.
For those of you following my blog, my old guild has in effect collapsed. Their website doesn’t even exist anymore, although the forums still do. I have therefore removed the link.
I’ve been sorta watching them ever since I left. Kind of hard not to do considering the friends I left behind. A part of me expected the collapse months ago while I was still there. Signs pointed that way although I’m sure not everyone would agree with me as to what those signs were.
I resisted the urge to leave my guild because of friendships and a part of me wondered if it would collapse if I did. I chalked up such thoughts to narcissism.
Once I found out about the collapse, I was a little surprised that I didn’t feel guilty. I know that before I left, feelings of guilt kept me there. So why did I not feel guilty now?
I started to really think about it. I realized that without meaning to I had gone through a series of steps, or realizations if you will, that ultimately made the process a lot easier.
Friendships & Loyalty
Things had gotten pretty bad for me. I was not happy. I dreaded logging in and playing. Every day was a constant battle with myself between wanting to play and not wanting to deal with it.
After dealing with months of guilt, I finally realized that ultimately for me to keep playing the game I needed to enjoy it again. I decided on a server transfer to completely remove myself from some of the problem people and the temptation to rejoin the guild. Due to time and now even more distance from the guild I am not opposed to admitting publicly that one of the biggest reasons for quitting was due to a small group of people. The realization that I needed to get away from them was the deciding factor.
What I realized was that this is a game. The whole point of playing is to have fun and I hadn’t had any for a long time. Although I had friends I didn’t want to leave behind, I realized that as my friends they would hopefully understand and even if they didn’t completely understand, they would at least not hold it against me.
Friends come and go. Unless you’re somewhat lucky, you probably don’t even have the same friends you did in Kindergarten. You probably haven’t stayed in touch with many of your High School friends. College roommates? I don’t know where any of mine are anymore. I haven’t kept in touch with former work friends from even 18 months ago.
These things happen. Maybe to some of us more than others–especially considering I’ve lived in 9 states and 3 countries–but it happens to all of us to some degree eventually.
Making Your Own Decision & Dealing With Guilt
If you find yourself in this position, just remember that if they are true friends, they won’t hold your decisions against you. You may even try to stay in touch if you server transfer, but things may never be the same. It isn’t that you don’t like each other, it’s more that both of you have moved on. We may still be playing the same game, but guilds and/or even servers may be different, making the things you have in common a little different.
A little guilt is normal. It’s even healthy to some degree. Before leaving I even considered asking my friends to come with me because I thought it would alleviate some of that guilt I was feeling, but it appeared that the guild was doing well and going to survive. It wasn’t fair of me to ask, so I didn’t.
Once you realize that your true friends will accept your decision and not hold it against you, leaving a friend’s guild or even server transferring is an easier decision to make. I didn’t say it was completely easy, just easier.